yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
