so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
