Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
