Me too!
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
