So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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