"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
4 words: hood of his car
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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