Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize