Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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