i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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