My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
