I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Alive.
So much puke
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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