sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
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