Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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