i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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