She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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