im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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