I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
