is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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