I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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