Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
