you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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