He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
