She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize