whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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