Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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