found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
