That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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