my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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