Got a toothbrush?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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