we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
