with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Randomize
