She said her name was "party"
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
