There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
