its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
