another moral hangover. fuck.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
