I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
