And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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