I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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