And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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