jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
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