Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
