I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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