I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
