isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
