is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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