Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
