yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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