i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
