we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
