So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
